Sayeth The Bee

these have aged a little bit, but I love them –

“I’m laughing so much my kidneys are starting to fill up.”

“Daddy, sometimes when I have to go to the naughty chair, I feel crestfallen.”

“Mommy has something in her tummy, and it’s not food, it’s a people!”


Starting Preschool – Trying Times

So far, Bee is having a hard time being in (two day, afternoon pre-) school.  It has only been 2 days, mind you, but it is still a hard time for us.

She puts on a brave face at drop-off time (the first day she was so excited that she forgot to say goodbye – instead launching into “I have great news! Today is my first day of school!” with the teacher.  Then later the stories unfolded about how she was so sad while I was away.

Almost the very first thing to come out of her mouth when she woke on the second day of school was, “Why would we waste a perfectly good day like this at school?”, followed by “You’ve already taught me everything they teach there, anyway.”

She’s usually such a happy kid, and makes friends on playgrounds in 2 seconds flat, so it’s confusing new territory and it breaks my heart – but I’m trusting those that say it gets better.

Here is one resource, among several, that I’m ‘road testing’.

Quick Click: 9 Parent-Tested Ways to Ease Separation Anxiety – Ease preschool drop-offs with these simple suggestions.

We picked up a copy of The Kissing Hand this afternoon, too – and we’ve read it together three times.  Her teacher suggested making a necklace with our pictures on it that she can wear – so, we’ll try that tomorrow (her third day).  They are all reading A Pocket Full Of Kisses tomorrow in class (which is a sort of Kissing Hand sequel).

We addressed the subject of her being more advanced than many of her peers by choosing a mixed-age Montessori classroom for her – even so, her teachers seem very impressed by her vocabulary and knowledge.  When she isn’t crying.

I’ll post more about these days of change in our home – including pics and info about the biggest little change – but this post serves as my late night venting about a subject that is probably affecting a lot of families at this time of year.

Some Strange Dialog (babies, gender, expectations)

A guy (lets call him Dad) and his daughter (call her Bee) walk into a maternity store to try to get a nursing nightgown for some big ole’ pregnant lady (known as Jungle Woman).

Further cast:  Employee Woman, Expectant Mother, Expectant Father and Their Daughter.

Overhearing, between Employee Woman and Expecting Family-

Employee Woman: So, do you know what you are going to have?

Expectant Mom: A little boy.

EW: Oh GOOD!  Is this your daughter?

EM: Yes.

EW: Oh, wonderful – then you are done then!

Expectant Father: Oh no we aren’t.

EM: (unsettled) Don’t get him started.

EF: We are going to have 14 kids.

EW: Oh, lol, that’s a lot 🙂

EF: No it isn’t – people always used to have 12 or 14 kids.

EW: lol 🙂

EF: (dead serious)  …speaks a bizarre little speech about how he is serious, everyone becoming uncomfortable…

Then the expecting family leaves.

Bee to Employee Woman: My Mommy is going to have a baby!

EW: She is!  Do you know what it is?

B: Yes – it is a girl!

EW: (less chipper, strangely solemn and conciliatory) Oh – so you are going to be a big sister?

B: Yeah!

EW: Would you like some bubbles?  (hands child bubbles)

B: No thanks, I have lots at home.  (hands bubbles back)

EW: Oh – well you can have some for the car (tries to hand child bubbles).

B: No, thank you.

EW: Then here – have some stickers! (hands child stickers)

B: No, thank you.  I have a box of stickers at home.  Thanks for offering!

EW: Oh – well, okay – um, good job, you don’t take things from strangers!

We leave, because they don’t have the gown that Jungle Woman requested that we go and get for her.


I’m not going to editorialize too much – but here are the facts:

• Employee woman asked everyone what they were having, and if it completed a set of one boy + one girl – that meant that you should stop – because you’ve achieved what she feels is the goal.  If you have not achieved this, it appears that she assumes you are disappointed.  I think it is possible, her being an employee there, that this dialog plays out all day every day.

• That guy wants 14 children, and is very serious and kind of confrontational about it. He also had ‘crazy eyes’ – an objective assessment, since it is factually/statistically unusual to see the whites the whole way around somebody’s pupal as they respond to joking with bared teeth and are unreceptive to attempts to placate them.

• Sometimes offering gifts to children is a sophisticated way of determining whether they have been introduced to ‘stranger danger’.

Sayeth The Bee



“That’s called a striped bulldog spider cat monster.”

After naming a turtle we found, “Turd”:

“Daddy, maybe you can scoop Turd out of the lake.”

Specific love:

“I like black and stinky dogs that are girls named Fergie.”


“No, you’re not running.  You are pretending to run.  Run real.”

Hard to explain:

“I’m an Earth maggot that stands up, I’m very expensive.”

Sayeth the Bee

some recent quotes (age 3.5):


on efficiency:

Daddy: Where are your pants?  Why did you take your pants off?

Bee: Because I run better without them – – Whaow!!! (runs away, buns wiggling)



“I like food that has hot dog rolls with it.”



“I’m doing my lung exercises.  I’m exercising my nibbles – so they will be nice and good.”  (and yes, she meant nipples)


Sayeth the Bee

some recent quotes (age 3.5):


on movies:

Sometimes when it plays the sad music, it means that a girl grownup is in love with a boy grown up.


reassurance after loud crashing noise:

No reason to be worried, it was just an accident



I want scrambled eggs with salt and pepper on them, not salt and pepper in them.